Answered by Ustadh Salman Younas

Question: What is the Islamic perspective on marrying someone older than you? My family believes it is not a good decision to make (based on cultural biases or beliefs) but what if everything else is sound, such as their deen, character, habits etc. and the only thing that is an issue is the age. Should it be taken into consideration?

 

Answer: wa `alaykum assalam

The Validity of Marrying an Older Person

Legally speaking, there is nothing preventing the validity and soundness of marrying someone older or younger than one. To my knowledge, there is absolutely no difference of opinion on this between any of the orthodox legal schools.

Should Age Be Considered?

As for giving age consideration when choosing a spouse, this is a personal decision one makes. For some, age may be an important factor when deciding whom to marry. For others, it may not. Though the most important consideration is religion, the Law does not prevent considering other factors, such as habits, beauty and attractiveness, cultural background, age and the like. Sometimes, these factors are important when judging the compatibility of two individuals.

Dealing With Family

In the situation where one finds him or herself in conflict with family over such matters then my advice would be to try and have an open, mature, and respectful conversation. One should not simply dismiss the concerns of elders but attempt to allay them with wisdom and tact. Perhaps involving someone everyone trusts, such as a religious figure, to help explain and mediate things could also be beneficial.

Salman

Checked & Approved by Faraz Rabbani

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